Let you Feel
by Dragongirl4741
Summary: After a bad date with Rodney "no never :P" Jennifer needs to blow off steam. What will Ronon do to make her feel better. I suck at summeries.**Epilog added** Please R
1. Chapter 1

Let you Feel

**A/N: **I am going to finish my other story I Promise. I have just been hitting a will with it and when I got this idea and Blen said it might help to write a different story I started writing this. It is very short only one more chapter (assumeing the stroy doesn't run away from me).

**Spoilers:** Not too much but some mention about events since the end of LTL

**Disclamer:** Not mine it is just for fun. I will return all characters in more or less the same way I found them.

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Jennifer stormed into her office, glad it was the night shift. Not that there was much need at the moment, and there were few around to wonder exactly what had put the CMO in such a state. There wasn't an actual door to slam so she settled for going to her filing cabinet and roughly pulling one of the drawers open and grabbing a handful of files before slamming the drawer shut again. She sat heavily in her chair with her files in front of her. She needed something distracting.

Opening her laptop, she went into her music player, quickly picking the play list from when she had burned a CD to listen to while she was doing her cardio. The songs were loud and fast, songs that fit her turbulent emotions.

Since she was young, she had liked to use music to help calm her. She let the pounding beat of Bodies by Drowning Pool flow out of her computer speakers and over her. Jennifer took a deep breath and closed her eyes, letting the drums and bass help to take her rolling emotions and give them a beat.

She opened her files and started to work. Song after song, file after file disappeared. Jennifer hardly noted the passing time. She looked up from the next to last file and saw that it was now a little after 11 pm. She had been working for more than an hour. She was surprised at how much she had been able to get done. Maybe she should work while mad more often, she thought with a wry smile.

Jennifer decided that she was done with the loud angry music. It was time for softer music, something a bit more relaxing. She stopped her current play list and started a different one. The soft even sound of the piano started to play and Jennifer let out a small humorless chuckle at the irony of the moment. Closing her eyes, she listened to You Don't See Me by Josie and the Pussycats while taking a moment to think back on her date with Rodney.

First Rodney had been late. That alone might not have bothered her too much, but it was that on top of everything else. He didn't even have the decency to radio her and say 'Hey, I am running late.' She was aware that he got caught up in projects. Even she was guilty of it from time to time, but in a case like this, she would have been paying more attention.

They had both been so busy the last few months working on the drug that would remove the wraith need to feed on humans. The failure of the drug, the wraith attack on Earth, and then all the other things that had happened since they had started dating kept them both busy. So when things settled down a bit before the trip back to Pegasus, she thought that it would be nice to have a quiet evening just the two of them.

She had left the infirmary a little early that day. She wanted to make the night special. So she got to her quarters and made dinner. Having access to some amenities of earth was so nice. She couldn't cook much, but she had learned how to cook one of her dad's favorite meals, Cornish Hen with mushrooms and white rice. She had jumped in the shower after putting the food in the oven to cook. When it was finished, she turned her little oven to the lowest heat setting to keep the food warm and took the time to finish getting ready.

Just before 8 she took a last look in the full-length mirror to make sure she looked as good as she could. Her hair was in loose curls around her shoulders. There was a light dusting of a pale shimmering eye shadow. On her lips, she was wearing pink lip-gloss, which perfectly matched her dress. A spaghetti strap pink dress with a v-neck and almost no back came to a stop just above her knees. On her feet, she wore a pair of ballet style slippers, mindful of the fact that in heels she was taller than Rodney.

She dished out the food onto two plates, placing them on the table that she had set earlier. She grabbed a bottle of white wine and lit the candles that were also on the table and waited.

Five minutes after 8, she was fidgeting and picking at invisible lint on her dress. 20 minutes after that she was pacing the floor. Another 20 minutes later, she was upset and about to walk down to his lab and find out why he had not felt the urge to show up or radio her. That was when her door chime sounded.

Rodney came in when she opened the door, giving her a rushed and too brief apology for his tardiness. He said that he was overloaded, having to do everything alone because he was stuck with a bunch of idiots who wouldn't know pi from a phone number. He prattled on about how important his current project was and how yet again it was up to him to make sure that everything was perfect. He told her that it would serve the SGC right if he chose to no longer work for them and how much trouble they would be in then.

She listened to him talk, saying very little herself. Of course, as fast as Rodney was going she doubted if he would have noticed if she had said anything at all. She let him talk, aware that everyone needed to blow off steam from time to time, although that was becoming a pattern; him talking about whatever he was doing and then not reciprocating when she needed to let off some steam. It wasn't until he made an off-handed comment that she had finally had enough.

He said that dinner was a bit cold and chewy, and that was when she snapped at him.

"Dinner is cold because it was ready at 8, which was when you were supposed to be here, Rodney! I told you that I wanted to have a nice quiet evening just the two of us alone. I made a special meal, and you couldn't even bother to tell me that you would be late. I kept telling myself that you would be here any second, so I didn't put the food back in the oven to stay warm. Then when you do show up 45 minutes late, all you can do is blame other people for your inability to tell time! On top of that, you haven't even said anything about my outfit!" Jennifer was practically screaming at him by the end of her little tirade.

"Wh…I…I…Jennifer I…"

"No! I don't want to hear it tonight Rodney. I am not in the mood. Right now I want you gone." Jenifer watched as Rodney opened and closed his mouth for a moment or two before yelling again. "Now, Rodney! Go!"

"Well…Okay, if that is what you want." Rodney said quietly. He slowly stood up and walked out of her quarters, and never even looked back.

Jennifer didn't wait long after he left before leaving her quarters. She needed to get out and because she felt guilty for putting her work to the side for a special night, with someone who didn't seem to care, she headed to the infirmary.

Jennifer opened her eyes to see Ronon in the doorway to her office with a cut on his forehead, which was causing a steady stream of blood to flow down the left side of his face.

"If you are busy, I can go." Ronon said, watching her closely.

"No, it is okay I can use a break. Plus it isn't like there is a lot medically that needs my attention at the moment." Jennifer said, while standing up and reaching for her lab coat. She was grateful for the small smile that passed across his face. Hopefully this meant that they could be friends again, and the cold shoulder that Ronon had been giving her was slowly beginning to thaw.

They stepped into the main room of the infirmary and Ronon, having been through this countless times before, jumped up on one of the beds.

"Yup, you need stitches." Jennifer said, after looking closely at the wound. "You know the drill, lay down and I will get you fixed up in no time."

"You are sure you aren't busy? I mean, that isn't normal uniform for you." Ronon said, looking her up and down while she put on her latex gloves.

"Oh no, it is fine. Things just didn't quite go as planned tonight and I came back to work before I even thought about changing."

"Is that why the music?" He asked, with a nod to her office.

"Yeah, it helps me relax. Gets me out of my head for a bit." Jennifer said, glancing at the door to her office, where she could hear the faint sound of Love Story by Taylor Swift playing.

"What did he do?" Ronon asked, watching closely, not missing the look of sadness that crossed her face.

"What? Who?" Jennifer asked, turning her head away. She busied herself with making sure she had everything she needed to stitch up Ronon's head.

Ronon just watched her. Jennifer felt his eyes on her, and knew that he would get his answer out of her one way or another. Maybe if she gave him a simple summary or made up some lame reason her evening had not gone according to plan then he would leave it be. No, she couldn't do that. This was the first time in months he had really talked to her, not just a grunt or one or two word responses to questions about an injury. She wasn't going to insult him by lying to him; he would know that she was lying anyway so she would tell him the truth.

"Jennifer, it will help if you tell someone." He said, while using his thumb and forefinger to turn her head so that their eyes met.

"Okay." Jennifer said, taking and releasing a deep breath. "But remember, you asked for it."

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**A/N2:** Reviews are my drug of choice please tell me if you like it;


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Here is the next chapter I would have got it up sooner but it wasn't quite right and with the help of my Wonderful Beta MrsCopterDoc we figured out what was off and then her and her Daughter helped me with finding 3 songs in this chapter. Thanks so much I would have been lost without the help :D.

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Chapter 2

McKay walked past Ronon without acknowledging the larger man. Ronon paused, and watched McKay for a moment before continuing around the corner. Jennifer's door slid open and she walked out. Ronon stopped and watched as she looked straight ahead and walked off in the direction of the nearest transporter.

Ronon wondered what had happened to the "happy" couple. He shook his head with a sigh. That wasn't nice of him, he could hear Teyla's voice tell him. He had been hurt more than he cared to admit when Jennifer had told him that she was interested in someone else. To say he had been surprised when that "someone else" turned out to be none other than Rodney McKay would be an understatement.

6 months had passed since then and he still found it hard to believe. Teyla had talked to him once about it and tried to tell him that if he truly cared for Jennifer he should be happy for her. He wanted to be happy for her, but he couldn't quite shake the feeling that she wasn't truly happy like he thought she should be. That feeling led him to believe that she had made a mistake. That he couldn't do anything to fix it made everything even worse.

"Hey Ronon. You busy?" John's voice suddenly sounded in his ear through his radio.

"No, I was just leaving Teyla's."

"Since I missed our sparring appointment earlier, do you feel like getting your butt whooped now?"

"Oh, are you going to have all the marines with you to try?" Ronon said with a smile, changing his destination to head to the gym.

A little over an hour later Ronon walked into the Infirmary. At that time in the evening there were not many people in the darkened infirmary. The light and sound spilling out of Jennifer's office drew him closer. Before he got to the doorway the current fast paced song that he didn't know the name of suddenly stopped, and a light gentle song took its place. This song seemed to fit her personality more than what little he had heard of the previous song.

_This is the place where I sit_

_This is the part where I love you __too much_

_This is as hard as it gets_

_'Cause I'm getting tired of_

_pretending I'm tough_

_I'm here if you want me I'm yours you can_

_hold me I'm empty and taking and tumbling and braking_

She didn't know he was there, but that was nothing new. How often had he snuck up on her in the past? He had tried to get her to be more aware of her surroundings when they had been sparring, and she was getting much better at it then she used to be. He was never one to turn from an opportunity. He took a moment to examine her before letting her know he was there.

Her hair was a perfect frame to her face. He always loved when she wore her hair down. The curls were messed up; it looked ruffled like she had been running her hands through it, or someone else was running their hands through her hair. No, he wouldn't put that image in his head. The small hint of pink above the eyes reminded him of when she would flush. Her lips shined and sparkled, and again he thought back to that time so long ago when they had almost kissed in the false quarantine. The straps of the outfit she wore were small and delicate like her. She looked weak but he knew she had strength even if she didn't know it herself. The color of the outfit was pink like some of the flowers that had grown in Sateda.

Then her eyes opened and his visual inspection was over.

"If you are busy, I can go." He told her.

"No, it is okay I can use a break. Plus it isn't like there is a lot medically that needs my attention at the moment." Jennifer said.

As she stood, he noticed the slippers that she wore on her tiny feet. A small smile he couldn't stop crossed his face. Was there anything about her that didn't scream 'out of place' here surrounded by life sucking aliens and big tough marines?

He didn't know the names of the songs she was listening to but he could hear the words and wondered if they meant anything to her.

_Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone_

_I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run_

_you'll be the prince and I'll be the princess_

_its a love story baby just say yes_

Although he didn't think she would really answer, he asked her about the music she was playing.

She looked to her office and he saw the look that passed her face for a moment. He had wondered if something was wrong when he had seen them earlier. That look on her face told him that something was defiantly not good. That flash of sadness that crossed her face made him mad.

McKay was so lucky to have Jennifer. Why didn't that man do everything he could to make her happy?

"What did he do?" Ronon asked, careful to keep more gravel out of his voice than normal. He didn't want to scare her.

He watched her as she made herself busy and tried to avoid answering the question. He knew that on some level she needed to tell someone, and maybe he would be that someone. If she really didn't want to talk about it she would have told him it was none of his business. She might not want to talk to him about it though; it wasn't as if they had been doing a lot of talk lately.

"Jennifer, it will help if you talk to someone." He told her, turning her head with his hand so that she was looking at him. He listened quietly as Jennifer stitched him up and told him about the night she had planed, and how McKay hadn't even noticed.

The songs kept playing and he heard them as they played. He was aware that the songs that played seemed to have this sad tone to them. They were about not being seen or a person who was not happy with the person they were with, from what he understood of them.

Did she pick these song to play or was it just coincidence that they were playing now?

_When I'm alone_

_I feel so much better_

_And when I'm around you_

_I don't feel_

For a man that constantly reminded everyone of how much of a genius he was, Ronon couldn't think of a more stupid thing for McKay to have done.

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Jenifer had thought that she would just tell him just enough. Tell him about the night but as soon as she started talking it was hard to stop. Before she knew it, she had told Ronon everything. She told him that wasn't even the first time something like that had happened. McKay had been late before for dates, He would talk at her not to her, and he would not always realize when she would dress up for him.

As she finished talking she heard the opening to Hot' n Cold by Katy Perry start to play. Did she really make a play list that had so many bitter love songs?

"Sorry, you didn't come in here to listen to my problems." She said, wiping a tear from her check. When did she start crying?

"You needed to let it out."

"I guess I did. Still, I didn't need to unload all of it on you." she said, waving her hand in his direction.

"No." He said, grasping her hand. "But I asked for you to tell me and you did warn me. I have no one to blame but myself." He told her seriously, letting her hand slid from his.

"That is true." Jennifer said with a smile, as she cleaned up the stuff from giving him his stitches.

"Thanks Doc." Ronon said, getting off the bed and heading out of infirmary.

She did feel better after talking to Ronon; he had always had that effect on her. considering this was the first real, or semi real conversation in months, even though she had done most of the talking, she felt that maybe things could defiantly be getting back to normal now.

"By the way Jennifer." He told her, stopping and turning back to her before he walked out the door. "McKay isn't as smart as he thinks he is. A truly smart man would do anything to keep you happy and a smile on your face."

Ronon was gone before Jennifer could even fully register what he had said. When it did, she was amazed. He might not always say much but when he did, he spoke volumes.

It was silent for a moment between songs and as the next song started, Forgotten by Avril Lavigne, she started to think. The last two songs had really made her think she needed to make a change, and she needed to do it sooner rather than later.

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**A/N2:** Okay the lines to the songs

1st was (as mentioned in the first chapter) You Don't See Me by:Josie and the Pussycats

2nd was (again in first ch) Love Story by:Taylor Swift

3rd was Together by: Avril Lavigne


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Juat a forwarning during the course of writing this I have found songs that fit in with the story. There is one song that I mention called Decode by Paramore. There is a word that is in the song and I did use when posting a couple lines of lyrics. The word is not the worst thing that could be said but I wanted to give warning that there is a questionable word so that no one gets mad at me for not giving a warning.

I also want to apologize for taking so long to get this one posted there is only one more chapter in this story (it got away from me and went longer than I had originally intended) I do hope to get it finished and posted soon.

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Chapter 3

Jennifer went and sat in her office as what seemed like sad song after sad song played. She looked at the play list and wondered about the songs that she had added to this one. She gave a humorless chuckle; 'a physiatrist would have a field day with this wouldn't they?' she thought to herself.

Paramore's Decode had just started playing as she started to think about her relationship with Rodney.

What was it that had drew her to him? He was clueless, and as socially inept as she was. He had a sweet side to him that very few ever got to see, but she had seen it. She knew that he could be abrasive and insulting, yet she knew that he cared for his team. She found so many little things about him enduring. All of those things had combined to make her want to know him better.

At first things had been great, but somewhere along the way things started to change. The shy nervousness started to fade away as he got more comfortable being around her and realized that she wasn't going anywhere. She thought that the longer they were together she would see more of that sweetness that she had seen in him but it seemed that he no longer wanted to show her that part of himself.

She told him that she loved him and she still did, but it wasn't the kind of love that she had always wanted in her life. She had always wanted to find a love like her parents had. She grew up seeing the looks that her parents would give each other. Her father would look at his wife like there was nothing in the world as beautiful. With her mother, she looked at him as if he was her hero, like he could do no wrong.

She sometimes wondered if she was just being naïve. Who really found anything like that anyway, but then again her parents found it why couldn't she? Was it worth it though, to throw away a relationship with a good man that loved her for something she may never find? That just made her think of another question, did he really love her?He told her that he loved her, and she didn't doubt that he did, but in actions, he didn't show it.

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Rodney had gone back to his lab for a while but he couldn't seem to concentrate on the work. So he eventually gave up and went back to his quarters.

Once there though, things did not improve any. He just couldn't get his mind to shut off, not that that was new to him. He tried to go to bed but all he did was toss and turn. He came to the conclusion that he would get nothing done until he talked to Jennifer.

He stopped by her quarters first but got no response, which meant she had gone to bed already, or more likely she was in the Infirmary.

As he approached her office, he could hear the music playing but he didn't know the name of the group or the song that was playing.

_But I am no gentleman, I can be a prick_

_And I do regret more than I admit_

For a moment if he was truly, brutally honest, that sounded like him.

"Jennifer." Rodney said, as he walked in.

"Rodney, is something wrong?"

"No, no, well actually yes, kind of." He told her, holding up a hand when she opened her mouth to speak.

"Let me go first then you can say whatever it is you want to say." Rodney took a deep breath and started to talk, not really sure what he was going to say.

"Look, first I want to say that I did not intend to be so late for our date tonight, or is it last night technically. Anyway not important when right now. I have no excuse for why. I will admit though that things like that will happen again.

"I know that I have these….issues that make me a less than desirable person to be around at times. There are times when I try to keep these aspects of myself hidden, but it is not easy to change a lifetime of behavior. No matter how much anyone tries.

"I guess what I am really trying to say is I care about you, I love you. I am just not sure that this whole thing is fair to you. Not that I am saying I don't want to be with you. Far from it. I do want to be with you and I can't just walk away. That being said, if you are willing to put up with me I will try my best to do better, but if you would rather end this now, I understand."

As Rodney stopped talking the only sound in the room was the music that came from the speakers of the laptop.

_I'm good at seein' the signs _

_I'm good at reading between the lines _

_No use in hangin' on _

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Jennifer wasn't exactly sure what to say at first. She wished that others could see this part of Rodney. She wouldn't have heard so many questioning why she was with him if they had just heard this speech. She was also shocked that Rodney would admit any form of weakness like he had just done.

She was close to telling him that she would work with him to fix things and they could be together, but how much of that was just because of his speech? In the time it took him to say all of that, she was again reminded of why she had found herself drawn to him in the first place, but there was still so many other reasons why she should walk away from him.

Ronon's parting words rang through her head in that moment.

"_A truly smart man would do anything to keep you happy and a smile on your face."_

Rodney did make her smile but she was not as happy as she had always imagined she would be when she was with the person she was in love with.

"Rodney, I know that was not easy for you to say. I have been sitting here for a while thinking about the two of us for a while now. I do love you, but I don't see this relationship being good for either of us in the long run. I have one thing to ask of you though." Jennifer waited for Rodney to respond.

"Okay what is it?" Rodney asked, wondering what she might ask of him. "We care for each other and I know that I want what is best for you. I hope you feel the same."

Rodney nodded. Noticing again that the song that was playing fit so well with the current situation.

_It's too late to apologize, it's too late_

_I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late_

"Okay then, this is what I am asking for. We stay friends. I would hate to lose your friendship over this. I know that it will probably be a little awkward at first, but I think that in the end as long as we are both happy that things between us will be good."

"Of course." Rodney said. "I totally agree. I think it will be a bit odd but it will be better in the long run then if we ended up hating each other."

Jennifer nodded and closed her laptop, effectively shutting off the music that had still been playing. She stood and walked to Rodney and the two gave each other a friendly hug. Then Jennifer gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

The two walked out of the infirmary together, and went their separate ways. Rodney went back to his lab and Jennifer headed to her quarters knowing that she still needed to clean off the table before taking a quick shower and going to bed.

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**A/N2:** The songs used were Decode by Paramore, Good as Gone by Little Big Town, and Apologize by One Republic. If you would like to hear any of the songs that I have used go to my page there is a link to my LJ that has all of the songs listed there as well and links to all of the songs. As always Reviews are loved :D


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N **Sorry it took so long to get this up I was not sure on how to end it. But here it is. THe Final Chapter :D I hope you like it and it this one is unbetaed so any mistakes are mine and mine alone.

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Chapter 4

Atlantis had been back in the Pegasus galaxy for a month now. Things were back to normal. There were missions to go on, people to help and wraith to fight.

_I can't hide the way I feel about you anymore_

_I can't hold the hurt inside,_

_Keep the pain out of my eyes anymore_

Why did she hear music? The last thing Jennifer remembered was being on a mission with Major Lorne and his team. They were on their way back to the gate when it had activated. She remembered Lorne yelling to take cover, and then nothing.

She felt cold, sore and heavy. She wanted to grab for something to cover herself with, but she couldn't seem to move. She felt a warm gentle pressure on her hand. Who ever it was maybe they could help. She tried to squeeze her hand to let who ever it was know that she was there.

There was a voice but she couldn't grab hold of it. It started to fade away back to black.

--------------------

Ronon had been surprised when she squeezed his hand, but almost immediately he recovered.

"I felt that Jennifer. Do it again come on. I know you are strong enough to recover from this. You are stronger than you know, but I know you are just believe it."

Ronon continued to quietly encourage her as the music played. He kept his hand in hers hoping that the music he had playing would help her now like it had so many months ago on Earth.

_You're not alone, together we stand_

_I'll be by your side, you know I'll take you hand_

_When it gets cold and it feels like the end_

_There's no place to go, you know I wont give in_

_No I wont give in_

She wanted to talk to him, she wanted to tell him he was wrong. She struggled to swim to the surface of the inky black that surrounded her. She tried to speak to him but got nothing more than a faint moan.

"Jennifer? Can you hear me? Squeeze my hand again if you can."

Jennifer could feel the darkness closing in again, but she fought against it. She squeezed his hand hoping to hold on to what something that might keep her from slipping away again.

"See there you go. Come on open your eyes."

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Jennifer felt lighter more aware of where she was. She was aware of pressure across her legs just below her knees, and the feel of something solid against her leg at her knee. She could feel the warmth of the hand that was still holding hers, but there was no voice talking to her now. There was only the steady electronic beat of a heart monitor, and the ever continuing music that still played.

_Like a ship with no harbor like a bird with no wings_

_Like a fish out of water a dreamer without a dream_

_I have learned about losing I could lose most anything_

Opening her eyes slowly she blinked away the pain as her eyes adjusted to the subdued lighting. The first thing she noticed was the person that was asleep in a chair using part of her bed as a pillow. Ronon had his left arm laying across her legs just below her knees, his head resting by her knee and his right hand holding her left hand.

She gently pulled her hand from his and brushed a stray tendril of hair from his forehead. She was surprised at how much different he looked while asleep. He looked so peaceful and younger. He stirred awake at her soft touch and their eyes met instantly.

"Hey" he said softly.

"Hey. How long was I…"

"About 2 days." He told her.

"That long? I didn't realize. I heard you at times where you here the whole time?" Jennifer couldn't imagine that he would sit there all that time she was sure he had better things to do.

"I was worried about you."

Jennifer was surprised by not only his answer but the look in his eyes when he said it. The emotion she saw swirling there was breathtaking. She told him that she was interested in someone else because he was always this strong intimidating person. She had feared that Ronon had lived his life fighting the wraith and losing everything to them had mad him hard, unable to be gentle. Suddenly she realized that she had been running from herself and not him. She had not listened to that little voice in her head that told her he was not that kind of person. She had seen him worried over team members and she knew that he would never do anything that would seriously hurt anyone on the base, and somehow she had let her own doubts turn her away from him. More than that she was afraid of loosing herself in him that he would become so much a part of world that she would just fade into the background.

"I'm sorry." She told him, and when he opened his mouth to speak she stopped him with a wave of her hand. "I am so sorry about what I said months ago. I was running from myself and in the process I hurt you, for that I am truly sorry. I am sure it doesn't mean much now, but I had to say it."

_It's the heart afraid of breaking_

_That never learns to dance_

_It's the dream afraid of waking _

_That never takes the chance_

_It's the one who wont be taken _

_Who cannot seem to give _

_And the soul afraid of dying _

_That never learns to mend._

"What are you saying?" Ronon wanted to hear the words, he needed to know that she was saying what he believed she was.

"I am saying that I should never have pushed you away. I was scared of what could be. I thought that you would become so important to me that nothing else would matter, but truth is you are, and have been, important to me for a while now. I would love to be able to take back what I said then."

Ronon had heard enough. She was right he was hurt when she told him she was interested in someone else but through the months that followed how he felt for her had not changed. Sure he was angry at first and he had wanted to hurt her emotionally as much as she had hurt him. So he had gone out with Amelia a few times, but when the dates where over he felt like he had betrayed Jennifer. If she wanted to start over than that is exactly what he would do.

"Jennifer I would not deny you anything." Ronon told her scooting closer to the head of the bed.

"Lass you are awake. Ronon I told you to tell me when she woke up." Carson said as he came into the room interrupting the moment the two had been sharing.

"Yeah I was getting to that."

"How are ya feeling? Ya gave us all a bit of a worry. The Big Man here never left your side, and he made John show him how to get ya a bit o' music."

"Right now I feel great." Jennifer said locking eyes with Ronon.

_Looking in your eyes_

_Seeing all I need_

_Everything you are is everything to me_

_These are the moments _

_I know heaven must exist_

Carson looked at the two for a second before leaving without another word. He also made sure that they were left undisturbed. He knew that both of them had feelings for the other but for whatever reason they had not taken that last step. He was going to make sure that, for a few hours, the two could have sometime alone before the whole city found out.

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**A/N** I hope you enjoyed the story Please review.

Songs used (again if you go to my page there is a link to my LJ where links to all the songs can be found)

Anymore by Travis Tritt

Keep Holding On by Avril Lavigne

If I Lost You by Travis Tritt

The Rose by Bette Midler

Could Not Ask For More by Edwin McCain.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N Okay I was driving home a couple days ago and all of a sudden a plot bunny came running across the street and right into my car I got home and started this and finished it the next day, typed it up yesterday and had it betaed today. It is really an excuse to have fluff I hope you enjoy it.

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Epilog

Ronon and Jennifer had been together for a few months now, ever since Jennifer had been hurt while off world. Things between them were great. They talked, they laughed and they could sit together quietly and just enjoy each other's company. Teyla, John and even Rodney were happy for the two of them. All three could see how happy the two were together.

Of course, Ronon and Jennifer still had their fights. The two of them were too stubborn to not have their fights. They were usually short, and a lot of the time, the two could not even remember what had started it.

Over the last week, Ronon had been doing a lot of thinking. He thought about life on Sateda, his life as a Runner and his life since coming to Atlantis; both before and after he and Jennifer started their relationship. It had been last night, after Jennifer fell asleep, that he had come to a realization. As he watched her sleep, her deep even breathing and the feel of her body so close to his he; felt a peace he had forgotten he could feel. In that moment he knew what he had to do and one way or another he was sure that his life would never again be the same. Walking into the Infirmary and seeing her working, he knew he was doing the right thing.

"I am almost done, and then we can go." Jennifer said, knowing as soon as Ronon had stepped into her office.

Ronon walked to the side of her chair and waited while she turned off her laptop. When she was done she turned in her chair to look up at him, and he bent over to give her a kiss.

"Hello." Ronon said.

"Hello."

"You ready to go eat?" Ronon asked, holding out his hand to help Jennifer to her feet.

"Yup, let's go. I didn't get much lunch today so I am starving." Jennifer told him as they headed out of the Infirmary.

The two walked hand in hand through the halls both enjoying the closeness of the other.

"Hey, the mess hall isn't this way. Where are we going?" Jennifer asked.

"I thought we could have dinner in my quarters tonight."

"Oh you did, did you?" Jennifer said with a smirk.

When they got to his quarters, Ronon waved his hand over the door sensor. Once the door began to slide open, he looked over at Jennifer, waiting for her reaction. He smiled when he saw her eyes go big and heard the small gasp she let out as she saw the transformation his quarters had undergone.

As they walked in, Jennifer noticed it looked like Ronon had turned his quarters into a forest glade. There were potted trees all around the walls; so many that you could barely see the wall behind them. The branches were across the ceiling, and wrapped around all of these he had rope lights. There was a large vase full of flowers that Jennifer was sure she had never seen on the table that was at the foot of his bed. Every inch of the floor was covered in petals. Jennifer had no idea how he had done all of this. He must have been working all day on this.

"Ronon how did you…when did you?" Jennifer stumbled as she made a slow circle in place looking again at the room.

"I just wanted to do something special. Do you like it?" Ronon asked.

"Like it? Ronon, it is a paradise in here, I love it. It is the great outdoors without the bugs." Jennifer said, swinging herself into Ronon's arms.

Ronon quickly reacted and held her to him, carrying her to the bed where he sat her down with her back against the headboard. He kissed her forehead and walked around to the other side of the bed where he laid down and crossed his leg to face her. Reaching behind him to his nightstand, he grabbed a tray that was laden with a variety of small pieces of fruit.

"When did you plan all of this?"

"I thought about it last night."

"Last night? You have been busy all day then. Who helped?"

"No one. I wanted to do all of this alone. All I did was get Sheppard to take me to the mainland and asked to borrow the potted stuff from the scientist. Now eat." Ronon said, holding a piece of fruit to her mouth.

Jennifer closed her eyes as she bite into the fruit Ronon had placed in her mouth. She softly hummed as she let the sweet tangy taste of the unknown purple fruit dance across her tongue. Once she swallowed the bite in her mouth and opened her eyes, Ronon was ready with another piece of fruit. The pattern continued this way until Jennifer was full and the tray was empty.

"I didn't see you have any; aren't you hungry?" Jennifer wondered.

"I ate before I came to get you." Ronon told her, turning and putting the tray back on his nightstand. He then sat with his back on the headboard with his legs in front of him and wrapped his arm around Jennifer. She scooted closer to him and put her head on his shoulder.

"Not that I am complaining, but what brought all of this on?"

"I know I don't say it often, but I wanted to make sure you know how much I care, how much I love you." Ronon said, placing a kiss on the top of her head.

"Of course I know how you feel about me. I still don't know how I got so lucky to have you." She told him, placing a kiss on his chest.

Ronon had been a Runner for 7 years, he was a trained warrior, he fought even while in pain, and yet he couldn't seem to get the courage up to tell this amazing woman how he felt about her.

"I am lucky, but I still don't know how to tell you everything I want to say." Ronon told her, taking the arm not around Jennifer and grabbing the small remote that was resting on his nightstand.

"Ronon, you show me all the time. I told you I know how you feel." Jennifer said, looking up at Ronon.

"Today though, I don't think it is enough." he told her, bending his head to kiss her softly. As he pulled away from her, he pushed the button on the remote.

_Every time our eyes meet_

_This feeling inside me_

_Is almost more than I can take_

_Baby when you touch me_

_I can feel how much you love me_

_And it just blows me away_

_I've never been this close to anyone or anything_

_I can hear your thoughts_

_I can see your dreams_

_I don't know how you do what you do_

_I'm so in love with you, it just keeps getting better_

_I wanna spend the rest of my life with you by my side_

_Forever and ever_

_Every little thing that you do_

_Baby I'm amazed by you_

Ronon had known that the song would say exactly what he wanted to tell her. He had heard the song a little over a week ago while going through her play lists hoping to find songs that could help him tell her how he felt. He had never imagined finding one that fit so perfectly. He watched her face as the song finished and he knew that she understood.

"That is what I wanted to tell you, that and so much more. Jennifer, I love you. I love waking up and having you beside me. The nights when we are not together I don't sleep well. I wake up, you are not beside me, and I count the minutes until I see you again. I never thought I would ever feel this way after Sateda. I don't know Earth customs on this, but I want to be bonded, married to you, if you want me."

Jennifer threw her arms around Ronon's neck and hugged him all the while raining kisses on his face and neck before kissing him hard on the mouth.

"Yes!…Yes!…Yes! I would love to marry you! Earth customs, Satedan customs or both. I love you Ronon." Jennifer said, once they pulled apart to get some much-needed air.

Ronon laughed as he held Jennifer closer to him pulling her on his lap. It seemed that his life was perfect.

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Song Amazed by Lonestar (I am sure most of you know that but just in case ;) )

Reviews are my drug please support my habit ;)


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